Friendships, the real kind

Is there any point in life when one is too old to have real friendships? You know, the kind where you feel that instant connection, anything and everything you do together is, oh, so much fun! The kind of friendships you made when you were in class III. I remember seeing that new girl in my class III B, she'd just moved to town. We went on to become closest friends, and she still is, to date.  Its the kind of friendship where I don't need a calendar entry to remind me of her birthday, I miss her every time I have my cuppa chai, I vividly remember the innocence with which I wanted to be her best friend. 

Over the course of the last 30 odd years, I have been so fortunate in terms of friendships. The real kind. The kind where you could go to war for your buddy, where you could jump off the cliff with your chum. As we grow up, it's hard to build relationships like those - where you feel like you are meeting a piece of your soul, and all that is left is for that great friendship to take off and soar into the skies. 

At age 32, when that happens, one cannot help but be a little thrown off, if you get my drift. You just aren't used to these sorts of  soul-pal meet ups anymore, well, it hasn't happened for a bit now! And then, just like the first bike ride I took with my childhood friend, it's all too familiar. 

Hello, my dearest new friend. Cannot believe it took us so long to meet, you nut! Strap on that seat belt - it's going to be an absolute riot, this friendship.

To my Ma and Pa

There are few things that beat the joy of seeing your parent after 18 months. As of now, none come to mind. The senses tingle, the mind races, sleep leaves you, the images of them the last time you said goodbye replay in your head over and over, tears of happiness are shed in anticipation, you wish you could fast forward time to get to them and hit pause on time when you give them that first hug. 

Saying that I am fortunate to be the child of my parents is such an understatement. Saying that I feel like destiny's child is underplaying it. It's overwhelming and humbling at the same time. I never realized when they went from being caregivers to my closest friends. It happened so seamlessly that it's almost miraculous. 

So here's to two people who taught me to float on the clouds of success with my head held down, to cry tears of defeat while pulling myself back up, to never, never ever give up, to my biggest cheerleaders and my pillars of strength - I truly would be nothing without you. I hope I can spend the rest of my life, being for you, what you have been to me all my life - your strength, your pride and glory, your caregiver, your friend. I love you for everything you stand for - Ma, Pa.

Thank You

There are very few things that manage to bowl me over. Make me feel complete, joyous to new bounds, content. I think that I am at an age and at a level in my career where additional money does not necessarily bring additional happiness in the true sense of the word. Its got to be more than green, more than just climbing the corporate ladder. I am happy to report that I have found my "it" factor. I have finally found it and I could not be happier.

There are very few things that make one gloat with pride. Pride that you are associated with this amazing thing. That you are part of a culture, a sorority of sorts.

I feel like I am taken over and swept with a glow, I have a sprinkling of stardust on my shoulders and I feel like I am doing something that is extremely rewarding. For being the sole person who managed to do this to me, I thank You. I thank You for everything you have done, for every lesson You taught me and I hope continue to teach me, for every smile that it ended up bringing to my face, I thank You.  I bow down to You, my teacher. I bow down to everything You stand for. You have managed to make me happier today than I have felt in many many years now. For that and so much more, I thank You, Didi.

Once upon a time..

Once upon a time, there was an ordinary girl who came upon an extraordinary woman. The
morning began like every morning right before a vacation. I've had no sleep for the past couple of days because there is too much to take care of work-wise, too many one off things to cross off on the shopping list and juggling everything has made me, not surprisingly, grumpy. Needless to say, we are running behind schedule, the 5:00AM shuttle guy calls and my grumpy side is not merciful. I begin one of those ranting sessions which is oh-so-unnecessary, making life more difficult than it should be so early in the morning. My eyes are barely open, I am half running, half donning my boots and cursing beneath my breath, get onto the shuttle. Once in, I breathe, albeit for a second before my mind starts racing again. Passport, check. Boarding passes, check. Bitchy before vacation for no real reason, check. I barely hear the voice from the front seat, as I push back strands of hair falling on my face. "Going off on vacation, I presume", the lady says.  "Oh, yes", I mumble. "Where are you off to?", she asks. "Amsterdam, Paris and Brussels", I say, checking off items from my mental checklist as I speak, half wishing I got one moment of silence. Almost mechanically, I ask, "What about you? Are you off on vacation too?". "Yes, to Central America. With that crossed off, I will have 23 countries remaining to visit in the world.  At my age, it is an ambitious goal".That is when I look up and try to take a look at her face.  She would've been 80-something, has wrinkles, her hands are a little shaky as she sips coffee from her mug. "23 countries, that's it?  You must be quite the traveller", I venture, intrigued.At this time, she has my full attention, no mental math, no checklists, I am here, one hundred percent.


She tells me that she used to be part of an institution that set up schools for girls in
Saudi Arabia, Iran and many other countries in Asia. "My husband was an International Consultant", she says, "I went where he went and where I went, I worked to set up schools for girls". I am very silent by now, listening intently when she goes, "You must be into computers?". "Yes, I work with Qualcomm". "Ah, Qualcomm! We made a lot of money when the stock went up to 200 in the late nineties", she continues, "I must get technologically sound. I don't own a cell phone. Didn't keep me from getting about so far".  I smile and think of the enthusiasm she must have, to learn new things at this age. "Did you live in the Middle East for a while then?", I ask, trying to get her tell me more about her travels around the world. "For some time, before my husband and kids were murdered in Iran. My husband had this habit of asking a lot of questions, you know. We were always interested in other cultures, so we always asked questions. I guess they thought he was the CIA or something. He was out in the market with my kids and they shot him. They got my kids in the cross fire. They were 3 and 5. They made me go back to the States, I had all of 56 cents, 10 cents of which I used to make a collect call to my mom. The kind soul that she was, she scraped up enough to get me back home. Took me 25 years to become sane again". Everyone in the shuttle is quiet. I sense tears trickling down my face. I feel numb. "Ah, well", she says, "I love India. All the colors!". The shuttle stops. "Have a great trip", she says, looking back into at me, smiling. I get out and find myself staring at her from outside. I knock on her window, and she opens the door. "You are an inspiration, you know that?", I say, tears in my eyes. Her eyes twinkle, "I like you very much. Have a good life. Take care of your children".


Every once in a very rare while, we get lucky enough to meet people who are celebrities, in the true sense of the word. Every once in a while, we get a virtual slap from God. Today, I was bestowed with one. I feel petty for misbehaving all morning, and right there in the drop off area of Terminal 1, I burst out crying. Uncontrollably. I've met a woman who is my hero and all it took was a 45 minute shuttle ride.

Have we met?

Over and over, I find the title of this blog, extremely apt. Life hits you at 100 miles an hour, time and again and here I am. Stumped. This has never happened to me. I think there are bleak chances that it'd ever happen again. You think you've known someone for more than a decade, and given that time, you've probably come to learn quite a bit and have settled in to form a certain view of them, their personality, you've defined the give-some, take-some of the relationship. And then, right under your feet, everything changes. The person, your view of the person, you, your perspectives, the relationship.

There's this certain fun-shakiness in how unsettling the feeling is, there're spurts of exhilaration of this new discovery mixed with moments that make you "huh"? Needless to say, nothing is the same, ever again. It's this new thing, a new phase and it all feels fresh. You discover new sides to your own self because as humans, we never exist in isolation. If you find that you are smiling more, it's probably got little to do with yourself. Everything about you is feeding off of something new, something different and something that has changed. I think its futile to classify change as a positive or negative one. It's meant to be taken at face value. It's change. It has happened and every action in your life will now be taken given the altered artifact.

I am pleasantly taken by this alteration and I believe that there are aspects to me that I will discover,  new things that I will learn, all of which will blow my mind away, just like I was, merely some time ago.

Blessings

I always feel fortunate when I meet people who really get me. I feel fortunate that despite the minimal amount of time we've spent together, we have now laid foundation to a great friendship. We have now begun on a path of being there for each other, of being each other's support systems, of really having what, in my opinion, very few people have and that is extremely hard to find and keep. I, for one, have been extremely lucky in this aspect. I have few but very dear support systems and I cannot go one day without them. I said something to someone today which I liked very much (this is certainly the limit of loving oneself, I reminisce about things I said! Good God, I am a lost cause). Anyway, this is what I said - "I am awesome because I am associated with awesome people". Sounds a bit pompous eh? It most certainly is not meant to sound that way at all.

All of my associations are key contributors to this eclectic, now bordering on eccentric stuff I put out. I don't know if I just insulted my dear dear friends or praised the living daylights out of them. You see, that's the beautiful part of having people who get you, close to you. You almost never have to explain. And while I have so much to take, so much to learn from these inspiring people around me, I have so little to give back. And when they tell me that some of the things I give back are a level of comfort, act as a sounding board, a punching bag, I feel blessed. It's indeed hard to find the wonderful wonderful people that I have managed to find in my life. This one's dedicated to the newest addition to my precious list. You know who you are. Awesomeness thou art, personified. I am keeping you close to my heart for a long time starting 2 days ago. :) 

La vie à 100 miles une heure

Life at 100 miles an hour. That's been the title of my blog for 7 years now. Little did I know how life at 100 miles an hour actually feels like. When things come crashing down on your visibly quaint life and rock your world like nothing else. That is when you realize, you had NO IDEA how unsettling that situation is. Its not even funny how, when things are calm and in cruise control mode, we tend to take peace of mind, whether in personal or professional life so much for granted.

The good thing about the boat getting rocked is this. Actually it is a great thing about things being totally out of whack. Your relationships are tested. Your priorities are tested. The choices you make, when nothing makes sense, the people who remain by your side at the end of it all, the smiles you can manage to sport between tears, almost every aspect of adulthood is put to test. Almost always, things work out for the better. And hopefully at the end of it all, you have emerged a better person, a bigger person and a saner one at that.

La vie à 100 miles une heure. Life's hit me at 100 miles an hour and I've never felt better. I guess it's because I now know that something's gotta give, but in the process, I'll have managed to take so much.